When your teen is deferred or waitlisted by a college, it is unsettling—but it is not necessarily the end of the road. So, what do you need to know about that twisting road?
Deferrals and waitlists are rising
Colleges are coping with an unusually volatile admissions marketplace: application numbers are up, test-optional policies have reshaped who applies where, fewer traditional students are going to college, and yield (the percentage of admitted students who actually enroll) is much harder to predict. Plus, many colleges are also pushing early action and priority deadlines earlier in the fall. This earlier timeline means they’re making initial decisions long before they 1- know how big their applicant pool will be in the given year and 2- know how well applicants are doing with their senior year grades.
Deferrals and waitlists help colleges manage yield
These decisions that leave applicants “in limbo” are powerful strategies for colleges to manage marketplace uncertainties. It’s just feels a bit cruel that so many colleges add more strife to the student experiences as they navigate this highly-emotional process. So why do they? By giving out these “soft no’s,” the colleges keep strong applicants in play while they evaluate how the rest of the pool and their enrollment numbers unfold. Further, they create a strategy for identifying which applicants are most interested in enrolling. After all, they do not want to offer admissions to students who woud never choose to enroll.
What these decisions really mean?
A deferral typically means an early application (EA or ED) is being moved into the regular decision pool for another full review, often after midyear grades arrive. A waitlist decision usually comes in the spring. Regardless of which your teen may receive, both indicate that the student’s file is strong enough that the college wants to keep the option open rather than closing the door. Correspondingly, both of these decisions also mean your student may have a chance to gain admission later, especially if they signal clearly to the admissions team that they remain quite interested in the college.
Why following directions matters more now
Because more students than ever are sitting in this “maybe” or “purgatory” state, the steps a college outlines after a deferral or waitlist matter a great deal. Colleges will often ask students to confirm their interest, upload midyear grades, and sometimes submit a letter of continued interest. If your teen fails to follow these steps, their chances for good admissions news later in the cycle will fall off a cliff. Consequently, prompt and thoughtful responses to the colleges can make a big difference.
How parents can guide next steps
Parents are uniquely positioned to help teens turn emotional disappointment into thoughtful action. A helpful role includes sitting down together to read every line of the college’s instructions, building a simple timeline of what is due when, and encouraging the student to take the lead on emails, forms, and letters while you quietly manage logistics and reminders. It also means helping your teen balance hope with practicality: support them in completing all follow-up steps for the deferred or waitlist school while also pursuing enrollment plans at other colleges. This is a challenge made more difficult by your inability to predict whether a college will admit 5, 500 or 1,000 students from their deferred and waitlisted pools.
Actions to (hopefully) move the needle
There is no magic script, but consistently following the college’s recommendations can improve the odds that a “maybe” decision turns into a “yes.” Key moves often include confirming a spot on the waitlist if it is still a top choice, submitting a brief and genuine letter of continued interest, and sending updated grades and achievements. Plus, students need to keep their contact information and the college’s application portal up to date. These actions communicate organization skills and authentic enthusiasm, which can distinguish your teen in a large group of “on the fence” applicants when colleges start shaping the final version of their incoming class.
Fitz has dedicated the entirety of his 28 year career to encouraging higher education opportunities. He worked in the Vanderbilt, Duke Law and St. Lawrence admissions offices prior to serving as an enrollment management consultant for 200+ selective colleges around the country. He created Find The Right College to make trustworthy college counseling more accessible. Fitz is also the father of two teens so he also understands first-hand the challenges associated with a college search.
